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Matters of the Heart. Has a Commercial Fuck turned into a torrid Love Affair which has turned your life upside down? Fear not. We have experts here who can help you through your roller coaster ride. Tell us your story and we'll do our best to help.

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  #1  
Old 15-04-2021, 01:05 AM
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BatamBro BatamBro is offline
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Exclamation Why do you all cheat?

I'm in an healthy relationship but I still have fwb and visit the massage parlours to have my handjob. lol. I do question myself why am I being such a demon and want to just suicide for being such a selfish person.

anyone in the same shoes? healthy relationship but have fwb and visit massage parlours?
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  #2  
Old 15-04-2021, 01:21 AM
Haodimilo Haodimilo is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BatamBro View Post
I'm in an healthy relationship but I still have fwb and visit the massage parlours to have my handjob. lol. I do question myself why am I being such a demon and want to just suicide for being such a selfish person.

anyone in the same shoes? healthy relationship but have fwb and visit massage parlours?
For me, im married (sexless, or once in a blue moon sex). Too stressed out with work. So going to massages for the handy and occasional paid sex to relieve steam and get some attention where im not getting at home..
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  #3  
Old 15-04-2021, 01:24 AM
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Re: Why do you all cheat?

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Originally Posted by Haodimilo View Post
For me, im married (sexless, or once in a blue moon sex). Too stressed out with work. So going to massages for the handy and occasional paid sex to relieve steam and get some attention where im not getting at home..
But do you feel guilty when you are back home looking at your wife?
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  #4  
Old 15-04-2021, 02:05 AM
nkyc nkyc is offline
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Re: Why do you all cheat?

Same problem here. Yes the guilt is always there. I try to use the guilt to lower my frequency of cheating.
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  #5  
Old 15-04-2021, 02:11 AM
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Re: Why do you all cheat?

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Originally Posted by nkyc View Post
Same problem here. Yes the guilt is always there. I try to use the guilt to lower my frequency of cheating.
So you have a good relationship going on.. but this temptation is like an addiction?
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  #6  
Old 15-04-2021, 02:29 AM
nkyc nkyc is offline
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Re: Why do you all cheat?

I can't say my relationship is good... It's pretty rocky and with work and family stress with young kid is worse... I'm addicted to going spa/ktv and finding SYT who give me the attention and service i need... Without these sexcapades i cfm go crazy and maybe divorce by now liao
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  #7  
Old 15-04-2021, 03:48 AM
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Re: Why do you all cheat?

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Originally Posted by nkyc View Post
I can't say my relationship is good... It's pretty rocky and with work and family stress with young kid is worse... I'm addicted to going spa/ktv and finding SYT who give me the attention and service i need... Without these sexcapades i cfm go crazy and maybe divorce by now liao
This word "sexcapades" I can totally relate to this! Thx for sharing!
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Old 15-04-2021, 04:30 PM
justyouraverage justyouraverage is offline
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Re: Why do you all cheat?

My girlfriend is very religious, been with her since secondary school and canít touch her at all. Usually i only go out on dates with her to have dinner and nothing else getting tired of it already. Normally i just go for massage with hj.
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  #9  
Old 15-04-2021, 05:14 PM
Fabinho3 Fabinho3 is offline
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Re: Why do you all cheat?

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Originally Posted by justyouraverage View Post
My girlfriend is very religious, been with her since secondary school and canít touch her at all. Usually i only go out on dates with her to have dinner and nothing else getting tired of it already. Normally i just go for massage with hj.
So you have to wait until married then she'll give it to you?
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  #10  
Old 15-04-2021, 06:30 PM
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Re: Why do you all cheat?

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Originally Posted by justyouraverage View Post
My girlfriend is very religious, been with her since secondary school and canít touch her at all.
This is already a warning sign. What makes you think you can continue to touch her after marriage, after the kids are born? To her, a non-sexual relationship is acceptable to you before marriage. Why will a non-sexual relationship be a problem to you AFTER marriage? It was never a factor/necessity in your relationship with her and you can accept it.
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  #11  
Old 15-04-2021, 09:13 PM
justyouraverage justyouraverage is offline
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Re: Why do you all cheat?

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Originally Posted by Xgenre View Post
This is already a warning sign. What makes you think you can continue to touch her after marriage, after the kids are born? To her, a non-sexual relationship is acceptable to you before marriage. Why will a non-sexual relationship be a problem to you AFTER marriage? It was never a factor/necessity in your relationship with her and you can accept it.
That's why sian Bro. Not sure why i even get together with someone from Church. Back then younger never think too much get girlfriend already happy
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  #12  
Old 15-04-2021, 09:27 PM
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Re: Why do you all cheat?

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Originally Posted by justyouraverage View Post
That's why sian Bro. Not sure why i even get together with someone from Church. Back then younger never think too much get girlfriend already happy
Before marriage still can change gf. The years together will be holding you back from leaving her but think of the years remaining in your life... which number is greater?

To her, pre-marital sex is a sin. It is idealistic for her to think everything will be fine after marriage. She may not even like sex as you are likely to be an inexperienced lover. There is also a warning sign as she places her religion above you and you are unlikely to be a Christian. Quite easy to meet another guy who places religion first in Church. Will your current sacrifices really lead to marriage? Your children will also all be Christians. Can accept?

Nothing wrong with her religion but if you don't hold the same views, there will be multiple clashes coming up in future.
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Old 15-04-2021, 09:58 PM
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Re: Why do you all cheat?

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Originally Posted by justyouraverage View Post
My girlfriend is very religious, been with her since secondary school and canít touch her at all. Usually i only go out on dates with her to have dinner and nothing else getting tired of it already. Normally i just go for massage with hj.
Before u buy car, sure must test drive right? This one is wife leh, life long partner.

Imagine she only give u sex for baby.then after than 0 sex for 40years until the day u die?

Think carefully of what u want in life
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  #14  
Old 16-04-2021, 12:53 AM
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Re: Why do you all cheat?

Quote:
Originally Posted by justyouraverage View Post
My girlfriend is very religious, been with her since secondary school and canít touch her at all. Usually i only go out on dates with her to have dinner and nothing else getting tired of it already. Normally i just go for massage with hj.
I don't exactly have a religious gf
but she treats sex as a mood based thing
so with all that stress and work life balance issue.. sex hardly happens.
how do you feel each time after the massage with hj?
do you question yourself.. and be like "damn what have I done"
or do you tell yourself something like "yeah that was worth it.. now back to being a nice boyfriend again.. no sex ahead 🙂"
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  #15  
Old 16-04-2021, 04:28 PM
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Re: Why do you all cheat?

Quote:
Originally Posted by TomMAffolter View Post
you sound like you need a psychiatrist...everyone different, humans are known to rationalise things for their own benefit, guys can murder others and rationalise as a form of self defense, others kill accidently and be haunted for rest of their lives.
Ask these questions without knowing the exact situation or the mental state of a person answering is pointless..for me if i need to "cheat" then its a sign im in the wrong relationship and id rather be free and SINGLE to do as i please than be in a restricted and "fake" relationship, PS if you think you are a "nice" boyfriend, then tell you gf what you do, see how "nice" she thinks you are
Lol, I am a nice boyfriend and I have my own sexcapades.
If I need psych help, I'll probably not be able to even survive the current relationship.
Thanks for replying anyway, you sound like a troublesome person.
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